A Saturday Story

A quick story to start your morning. I'm not sure all these years later that this is exactly how it played out, but if the details are a little off, it's worth retelling because the O'Henry ending might be instructive.

Back when I was a seventh- or eighth-grader, there was a kid in my home room who had an older sister. Yikes, was she old. Maybe 22 or 23 or something like that. I mean, she was old!

Go figure, she decided to join the military. As it turns out she was getting married and, unable to bear the thought of his beloved heading off without him, her fiance signed up as well. Again, if I remember correctly, there was some kind of buddy program at the time where people could sign up for the military and be stationed together, so off they went in lockstep.

Wouldn't you know it, before long the wife became pregnant and got mustered out of the military. The husband? Stuck city, as Dick Vitale might say.

OK, the details might be apocryphal, but here's why it is interesting:

1. At its spring meetings, the Patriot League's Council of Presidents revised its version of the Academic Index to "enhance admissions and athletic competitiveness of programs externally while maintaining the integrity of the League's founding principles." Think of that as renewing vows with the Ivy League.

2. Now the Ivy League presidents are meeting.

3. Guess what two letters the whispers say the Ivy League will at least consider dropping. The Patriot League if that happens? Stuck city, as Dick Vitale might say.

Dartmouth football has a job posting on a popular coaching web site. Here's what it says:

Football Video Coordinator/ Football Operations Responsible for hiring, training and supervising the video film crew; coordinating video setup, taping and editing all practices and games; coordinating all video exchanges with opponents; production of season ending highlight video. Prefer experience operating the DVSport Software System. Responsible for assisting with the following Football Operations: coordination of football team travel; oversight of maintenance and scheduling of football facilities; spring alumni golf outing and fall football reunion weekends; organization and daily operation of football office. $20-$30K based on experience. Please fax resumes to 603.646.3576 or email Don.Jennings@Dartmouth.EDU with Cover letter and resume

Today is the Dartmouth Friends of Football golf outing at Hanover Country Club. I'll be stopping by to say hi to some old friends and dig around to see if there's anything to report.